BACK I PRINT

Here are three of the twenty-seven "innercizes" featured in I Know I’m In There Somewhere: A Woman’s Guide to Finding Her Inner Voice and Living a Life of Authenticity

Innercize 5
Write Your Own Plant Tag

Plants from a garden store come with something that helps the people who buy them: a tag that tells the new plant owner what the plant needs. I invite you to do this for yourself.

Write what you need in order for you to bloom. Write down exactly what you need. Ignore whether you have it in your life. Ignore whether it’s realistic to ever hope to get it. If you need a housekeeper to come to your house twice a week, write it down. If you need a loving friend who gives you lots of hugs and encouragement, write it down. If you need five minutes, or 45 minutes, of quiet solitude every day, write it down.

Take some time with this. Enjoy this and allow yourself to feel whatever feelings this innercize brings up. Above all, see if you can be as truthful to yourself as you possibly can. Keep in mind: What do you need to flourish? What will help you bloom, as all flowers are meant to do?

Innercize 12
What Limits Were Placed on Your Wanting?

Take a moment now to think about when you were a child. You may find yourself drawn to a specific age, maybe eight, or four, or 13. Whatever age you choose is fine. Imagine the house you lived in at the time. How did you feel then?

Now think about the people who took care of you or were most important to you—your parents, maybe your grandparents, perhaps a very special teacher. What wants did you have that you were told, or simply sensed, were not okay to ask for from them?

These could be material objects, but it could have been other things as well—more hugs and affection, for example, or help with schoolwork or support for your unique talents.

Take a little time to sense this. How did you feel? Maybe you remember a specific incident. Were certain things "acceptable" but other things that mattered even more to you not?

What did you do with those feelings of wanting?

Give yourself an opportunity to write down what you’ve found.

Innercize 17
Returning To Your Self

When you find yourself going over and over in your mind, "What does he feel? What is he thinking?" you are indeed out on someone else. Your attention is outside of your body, no longer paying attention to what’s true for you. When you notice yourself doing this, imagine literally pulling yourself back into your body and landing your awareness there. Ask yourself, "What’s happening inside of me right now? What do I feel about him? What do I know? What do I sense? What do I feel about him? Am I sure I even like him? Is he treating me in a way that feels good to me, or am I trying to get him to?" Notice the feeling in your body that made you go out of yourself, which is usually some variant of insecurity or not being "good enough." Acknowledge that feeling, let it be there, and give it a lot of compassion. Then take a slow, deep breath, and concentrate on staying within yourself, and accepting yourself as you are. This, by the way, applies not just to intimate relationships, but to any person or situation (a party full of strangers, for example) where you find yourself going "out" of yourself and on to someone else.

INNER VOICE EXPERIENCE I FIVE PATHWAYS TO THE INNER VOICE
ABCS OF THE INNER VOICE I YOUR SELF AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP
INNER VOICE QUIZ I INNERCIZES I ASK DR. BRENNER
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